Tuesday, November 04, 2003
I am so sorry, dear, neglected blog. I have been really Busy (with a capital B) and have not updated you as much as I should.
I guess you should all know that He-Who-Shall-Not-Be-Named has been fired from the co-op kitchen. While I feel I have rarely looked on him with an admiring light, I am sorry that he was fired. Why was he fired? I do not know and think it shall remain one of those co-op mysteries like why they installed the front gate and then always leave it open. Why do I feel sorry? Ah, this question is much easier to answer.
This is the co-op. To be fired by the co-op, must a truly humiliating experiance because, simply, it is the co-op. I am not sure I can convey this to those of you who have not lived there. I love it (to a moderate extent), but it is, afterall, the co-op.
So in honor of this auspicious occasion, I will relate one last story and then lay HWSNBN to rest.
A few weeks ago, he went on a tongs-in-the-beans kick. You see, there are always red kidney beans in the salad bar with a serving spoon. The beans are small and slippery so a large spoon is the most appropriate vessel for carrying beans from the salad bar to one's actual salad. But he was forever telling us to put tongs in the beans. Anyone who has ever tried to pick up red kidney beans with a pair of togs will realize the ridiculous in this scenario. But he said that tongs would deter people from taking to many beans and save money. TO MANY BEANS? How can someone take to many beans? Does the phrase CHEAP AS BEANS mean anything to him? Beans cost like $.75 a can, and I know the co-op buys those large Costco sized cans. What next? A lettuce limit, a celery cap? (That was a fab pun thank you very much) I think working the salad bar angle is not going to save to many dollars and cents.
But then again, hardly something one is fired for.
I guess you should all know that He-Who-Shall-Not-Be-Named has been fired from the co-op kitchen. While I feel I have rarely looked on him with an admiring light, I am sorry that he was fired. Why was he fired? I do not know and think it shall remain one of those co-op mysteries like why they installed the front gate and then always leave it open. Why do I feel sorry? Ah, this question is much easier to answer.
This is the co-op. To be fired by the co-op, must a truly humiliating experiance because, simply, it is the co-op. I am not sure I can convey this to those of you who have not lived there. I love it (to a moderate extent), but it is, afterall, the co-op.
So in honor of this auspicious occasion, I will relate one last story and then lay HWSNBN to rest.
A few weeks ago, he went on a tongs-in-the-beans kick. You see, there are always red kidney beans in the salad bar with a serving spoon. The beans are small and slippery so a large spoon is the most appropriate vessel for carrying beans from the salad bar to one's actual salad. But he was forever telling us to put tongs in the beans. Anyone who has ever tried to pick up red kidney beans with a pair of togs will realize the ridiculous in this scenario. But he said that tongs would deter people from taking to many beans and save money. TO MANY BEANS? How can someone take to many beans? Does the phrase CHEAP AS BEANS mean anything to him? Beans cost like $.75 a can, and I know the co-op buys those large Costco sized cans. What next? A lettuce limit, a celery cap? (That was a fab pun thank you very much) I think working the salad bar angle is not going to save to many dollars and cents.
But then again, hardly something one is fired for.
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